Relating

Dark Shadows of the Heart

1/8/11

More and more Dakar and I come to realize that our quality of life improves when we are relating with people. Staying in, secluded, on our own is fine too, but we really find the most amount of change, of life living through us when we are in honest communication with people. This does not necessarily mean that I don’t enter into the casual “Hi” on the streets, but I find life much more fulfilling to immediately connect deeper with people.

I went to see a man once and he told me a very profound piece of advice that I had not been utilizing. We were talking about shallow conversations and the effectiveness of them. I found out that I liked being by myself more because I was uncomfortable in conversations that held no value for me. It sounds so simple, but he told me “In a conversation with two people, you have the opportunity to control 50% of the topic. If you don’t like what is being said, change the subject.” *Light Bulb* Duh!

So I find myself bring up subjects with people these days that start to dive deeper quickly. Sometimes I have amazing conversations that only last a few minutes, and sometimes I never hear from people again that do not share my perspective, and I am so okay with that! And other times, the cycle comes around again and I hear from people that have blown me off when they are ready to talk.

Blue Star Galaxy

In my ovary breathing tonight I stand naked in front of the moon and stars, closing my eyes and immediately see another nightscape, complete with its own dark sky, stars and moon. Two bright white statues, glowing like large Sphinx’s guarding this sacred space. Many, many shadow people show up in formation and are waiting for me to start leading them in the practice of ovary breathing.  I start the breath and we all connect our ovaries and testis with galactic space and the moonlight rays. I see the white light of energy run through the bodies of the beautiful shadow people, just as I feel it fun through mine. We pulse in unison, creating a powerful connection as ONE source pouring through us all. A dance of flowing energy on the edge of extasy as we move to the movement of the breath that wishes to breathe through us, Sphinx’s energize and glow even brighter, illuminating the dark, quiet night.

Lighting the candle of citrine, I remember to ask to manifest not only my desire to be clear within myself, but also for the desire to be in sacred union, relating and loving Dakar (and any person I am with even in casual conversation), praying for the healing of all sexual repressions.

I have been listening to more and more women admitting having sexual tension and loss of desire within themselves and their marriages. It seems so common, I wonder if we all have the same wounds to heal, or if they’re all different. If enough women do the work within themselves, can we really heal the collective of all humanity? Will all women and men benefit from only a percentage doing the work? My experience tells me that this is so, but with more and more people on the planet, more women and men need to join in the act of healing themselves, contributing to everyone!

I lay down in bed and placing my hands on my womb, I close my eyes and I am a vehicle, a transport device for the pearl galaxy in my womb. People gather round as my very large body turns transparent and this pearl rises up, revealing the galaxy within. I am floating out of my body, suspended, yet still present, then I drift to deep, comforting sleep as I remember Emily’s experience earlier today. At lunch she told me she felt funny, like she was riding in an elevator that dropped really fast. I showed her how to work on grounding herself, breathing the energy down her body, connecting her tailbone and feet into Mother Earth. She said she didn’t want to because she liked was happy to feel like she was floating around with the fairies!

Namaste,


Solar Eclipse of the Heart